Kids' Birthdays aren't Just for Kids

Tomorrow is my son’s fifth birthday (that's him doing what he loves best above). As my mother-in-law says, he’ll officially be a whole handful.

I find birthdays and anniversaries to be great times to reflect on personal growth and to check-in with progress on goals I’ve set. Don't worry, there will be cake and singing and silliness, too. And a few tears that only mothers know how to cry when their babies get older.

When I think back over the “whole handful” of years, I’m amazed at all that has happened in our little family (I’m keeping with the “5” theme):

1. We moved all the way across the country from Charlotte, NC to just outside Seattle, WA. If that situation doesn’t provide growth, I don’t know what will!
2. After two serious allergic reactions before his first birthday, our son was diagnosed with a long list of food allergies. As of last week, we’ve been given the green flag to add in larger amounts of eggs & milk into baked food products. This is cause for celebration at our house!
3. Our son became a loving big brother to a spit-fire little sister.
4. We’re now able to enjoy family adventures lasting longer than 6 hours. We’ve managed 2 weekend-long camping trips already this summer. I really never thought this day would come.
5. Our kids speak of their futures using empowering phrases like, “When I’m a runner . . . “ and “I’ll do that, too, because I’m strong!” I can't wait to see what will happen when they make those phrases come true.

Although the birthday is HIS, as the mama who birthed him, the day belongs to ME, too! This gives me the clearance to evaluate my goals in relationship to his life-span.

1. In his short/long (I haven’t decided if the time has been fast or slow!) life I published a book and sold over 1,000 copies of it.
2. Two weekends ago I set a running PR that blows anything from my “pre-kids life” out of the water.
3. I have completed at last a dozen quilts and already have a growing list of quilts to create over the course of his next five years. Only one quilt in his lifetime was for me – the others have all been gifts to celebrate weddings and births.
4. I started a non-profit social moms group in our community 3 years ago and it is still running.
5. My husband and I celebrated our 10 year engagement-iversary last week and our marriage is still going strong.

Now that know I can guide a child through life longer than I’ve held down any single paying job, my challenge begins. I must ask myself:

What are my new goals?
What experiences will I have the pleasure of remembering when the NEXT birthday rolls around?

Don't go yet! I have a challenge for you:

What life events prompt YOU to take a look at where you’ve been on your life path? What experiences lead you to set new goals as you head forward?

Reaching Beyond the Comforts of Home

"Mom, can we just stay home today?" my son occasionally asks.

For someone who is so set on adventuring and exploring, some days we find that home satisfies his needs. I feel that way sometimes, too.

Home is safe. We can really let it all hang out at home: we stay in our jammies until after lunch, watch an extra show on TV, splash in our kiddie pool, swing from the rope swing on our giant cedar tree, and read as many books as we can before falling asleep in the bean bag chair together. After stuffing our mouths with juicy berries . . . and maybe even some fruit snacks or otter pops (ice pops, icees, whatever your region calls them!), of course.

But, before long the kids do get antsy and we all know that means it is time to head to a park, take the dog for a walk, check out the used bookstore for a fun treasure, pick-up requested titles at the library, or meet up with friends for a play date. Those things are good for the soul, too, even if we do toss a haircut or grocery trip into the mix!

Sometimes I wish a change of pace for writing/promoting books could be so easy. How nice it would be to have a switch to flip for switching into high gear or back down into low gear. Or maybe there could be a GPS system for book publishing that calls out the next steps for me or helps redirect me if I miss my turn. Now THAT would be grand!

I've been enjoying some of that good ol' time at home recently, but know that the worker in me is antsy to get back into the swing of things - seriously.

Some ideas are brewing for new books, but now is really not the time to be thinking of publishing another title, or even sending out manuscripts to other publishers for consideration. Still, I think the ideas are worth of recording, so I need to block out some blocks of time to just sit and write, even if nothing official can happen with the work yet.

Getting out to meet readers/runners is important for promoting the book, but I've been so busy with my own running and life that a book tour hasn't panned out yet. I see some good options on the horizon, though, so one of my next steps is working to make public appearances happen.

I also hope to connect with readers more, both adults and kids. You can become a fan of We Are Girls Who Love to Run on FB (I hope you do!), I'm on twitter (http://twitter.com/writingrunner) and I do my best to visit other runners' blogs to get a good feel for the pulse in the running world. It is my hope that connecting with others virtually will help me find opportunities for face-to-face experiences (like I mentioned earlier!). See, I really do need to take that step OUT into the world to encourage girls and runners to recognize their strengths and reach their goals.

Making the book easy to buy is another goal of ours. We Are Girls Who Love to Run is listed on Amazon (you can even get a signed copy there!), but we're working to get the book into more brick and mortar stores and more on-line retail shops. That's another important step for our business to take this year. People can't buy it if they don't see it, right? Several specialty running stores in the Pacific NW carry the book, but I know there are some other good matches for it out there, Oh, and feel free to let me know if YOU know of a good place for my book!

I see that my son's desires for home days tend to come after wild weeks of inconsistency and unfamiliarity. Home is safe and home is comfortable. But I also see that my son has incredible times of growth and self-discovery when we do venture out and explore the "unknown". And my daughter? Well, she thrives on outings and outside experiences, too. In fact, I like to tell my husband that when I grow up, I want to be like HER. These photos say it all:

I'm more like my son, or maybe it is the other way around. It is easy for me to just tread water with the things I know. We can continue to sell a handful of copies each week using the few venues in place. That's easy. But, to really bring the book's message to life and reach out to girls and runners, I need to do more. It is time for me to really take a stand with this book and step into the scary "unknown" to reach our goal of selling 3,000 copies of the book this year. That's how we can make a difference. The trick is to keep it all in balance.

Scary?

Yes!

Hard?

Definitely!

Exhilarating?

I hope so!

As always: Happy running and happy summer reading!

Becoming a Good Sport

My son is just 12 days shy of his 5th birthday. For those of you without children, here's a translation:

He is a confident force to be reckoned with!

Really and truly, he wants to be a super hero when he grows up. If that doesn't pan out, he's sure that he will be "the best Globe Trotter EVER!" (despite the fact that his current basketball skill is that he knows what a basketball is). He assures me that he is a faster runner than me (despite the fact that he begs me to slow down so he can catch up when I'm running and he's biking with me) and asserts on a daily basis that he will always be older than his sister (which is, in fact, true).

Unfortunately hurt feelings can accompany all of this young confidence. He's starting to discover that other people's athletic skills are a bit more fine tuned than his and that hitting a ball with a bat is harder than it looks (even with a tee)! This makes my job as his mom a bit more challenging this summer than I thought it would be.

Thankfully I have some good stuff in my arsenal.

1. YMCA Rookie Sports Camp - My son spent the first week out of school at the soccer/t-ball rookie camp. I was thrilled that the core value they promoted all week was Sportsmanship. In addition to working on dribbling, catching, hitting (and running in the right direction), the group of 4-8 year olds learned how to encourage one another and celebrate success without being arrogant.

2. Books that promote kindness and acceptance of others - Now that he's reading independently more regularly, we're reading books together and discussing them the first time through. Then he rereads them on his own. After we read them again as a family (with little sister!) I have him tell me something the main character learned in the story. This often leads to an age-appropriate discussion about if/when he faces that situation what he can do. Where's Your Smile, Crocodile? by Claire Freedman was a good one we read last week that showed the importance of helping others. I was also happy to discover an Early Reader that chronicled a pair of friends who struggled with competition: Cork & Fuzz: Good Sports by Dori Chaconas. And you'll notice the new book Nico & Lola: Kindness shared between a boy and a dog by Meggan Hill in the photo below.

3. Family Runs/Rides - I DO want my son to feel confident, but I want him to feel good about specific things he can do (not just what he *thinks* he can do!). So even though when he rides his bike while I run it makes my runs s-l-o-w-e-r, I know this won't always be the case. To build his confidence as a rider, I'm using the time to cheer for him when he's doing well with detailed compliments: "Wow! When you steer straight like that, you can go farther faster!" or "I noticed how smoothly you took that turn!" These become part of our reports to his dad at dinner time and then we set a skill focus/goal for the next bike outing. Of course, riding on the tag-along on the back of Dad's bike during our family trail rides is great, too.

4. Water Balloons - Good ol' "Catch" isn't a favorite at our house (i.e., we have strong reading skills, but need to work more on hand-eye coordination!), so now we're working to make it fun and game-like so he can be successful when he plays a bit more seriously with kids at school or the playground. Water balloons are great for this on these warm summer days.

This last summer before he heads off to Kindergarten promises to be one of growth for all of us. I'm glad that fun can be at the base of all of it!

How about YOU? What do you do to help your children strike a healthy confidence balance? What's in your fun/learning parenting kit?

Nearly a Week Without Running . . . but still Thankful

(Rainbow over the Puget Sound after a rainstorm on Camano Island this weekend while we were camping - photo was taken right from our campsite!)

It is nearly midnight, but my brain is racing. I'm blogging in attempt to purge my thoughts and thus calm myself. No, no, I'm not awake worrying about anything and no, my redheaded temper isn't fired up about anything I can't change. I'm simply overwhelmed (in a good way) by some pretty simple things, for which I am thankful:

1. I am thankful that my mom was able to fly ALL the way from WA to MA for a weekend with the extended family of her youth. She gathered with her three siblings (just that part is amazing) and their dad to celebrate the life of her uncle with their countless cousins and, and, and . . . from what I hear, it was QUITE the gathering in honor of an amazing man. While there, my mom and her siblings also celebrated my grandpa's 85th birthday and were able to spend Father's Day with him. Today was likely the first Father's Day all 4 of them were with their dad in a few decades. Isn't that remarkable? I get all warm and fuzzy just thinking about it. Wow.

2. I am honored that my high school AP Chemistry teacher somehow remembered me after all these years and friended me on Facebook (along with a number of my memorable and colorful classmates). Her class and her talents as a teacher (beyond just the material) were important parts of my Senior year and her passion for teaching inspired me in my years as a teacher. It turns out she recently bought a copy of We Are Girls Who Love to Run. The book, and my regular FB status updates about my runs and silly anecdotes about my little family, are now helping to inspire HER as she enters the world of running and trains for her first triathlon in August. Inspiration truly is circular. OK, now my eyes are getting a bit blurry.

3. I have not run a step since last Wednesday (I think it was Wednesday, anyhow). Our family took off on Thursday for a long weekend of camping at Camano Island State Park and it was amazing. We did come home a day early, but ended up exploring another State Park this morning instead, so we didn't really lose much outside time with the switch in plans. We gained a bit of extra sleep and a fun movie night, though. The weekend away from computers, and telephones was just what this gal needed . . . and the weekend away from grass pollen and whatever else is triggering his allergies is just what this gal's husband needed. The beach, with rocks, driftwood, forts, crabs of all sizes and colors, wind, rain, rainbows, coin showers, and amazing clouds welcomed us. My daughter roasted her first marshmallow and my son enjoyed at least three fire-roasted blueberry pies with the mountain pie maker (in one night).

(This is the view from our camper on our camping trip this weekend - literally the best spot in the whole campground - talk about having a room with a view!)

4. I am thankful for the promise of a playful summer. This weekend reminded me that my children's childhoods are precious and short - I will be limiting screen time across the board. Our mission for the summer is to explore and experience while the getting is good. The kids can do without TV on a daily basis (though I think Saturday family movie nights will become part of our fun when we're not camping) and I can do without FB/Twitter/blogs on a daily basis. I will definitely check-in and post from time to time, but not with the regularity that you've seen from me in the past. Summer in the Pacific NW is too short!

(Here's my Boy Who Loves to Wiggle in his best form!)

5. I am thankful for readers and runners who have the book We Are Girls Who Love to Run on their shelves. I am thankful that they are sharing their passion for running/living a vivid life by recommending the book to others and by encouraging others to reach their goals (running or otherwise!). You can even find the book on Facebook and become a fan! The blog posts I do write over the summer will be running/book publishing related. I'll update you with info about where the book is headed, where you can find it to buy a copy (if you don't already have one!), and additional ways you can share your love of books and running with youth. This is, after all, my passion. I will also continue to share pertinent book reviews about similar, uplifting books.

(This is my 2 year-old Girl Who Loves to Run, doing what she does best . . . go, go, going!)

And with that, dear reader, I am feeling less fidgety and my brain is getting the message that it is okay to slow for the night. Tomorrow I will return to my love of running - refreshed & energized by the time spent with my family and the new perspective I have on what my place is in this world at this point in time.

Wishing you happy running and precious time with your loved ones this summer,

Brianna

Starting the last week of school with a Thankful Heart

The kids are down & out with the double whammy of environmental allergies & croup, but that doesn't mean there aren't things for which to be thankful! As this last week of school gets going (well, it will get going for us on Wednesday when he's not contagious anymore), I am thankful for:

1. The wonderful educational foundation my son has received in his two years of Montessori preschool. Wouldn't trade it for anything and I look forward to my daughter enjoying her years there when it is her turn.

2. The friends I've made through my son's school. At least two of them have joined me for runs, so you know they are amazing women (even the non-runners are great)! Yes, parents can make friends at school, too.

3. My 25:51 PR at the Duvall Days 5K on June 6th (and placing 14th out of 220 women)! Thanks to the combination of group runs, Sane Fitness strength training, and a little "kick in the pants" from my husband (more like a dare, really), I discovered that YES, this body can go a bit faster and actually enjoys the challenge. Think I can break 25:00 by the end of summer? Hmmm . . .

4. The promise of the lazy days of summer. Our family calendar is filling quickly with camping/hiking/music filled adventures. In fact, last weekend we managed to ride 2 ferries, visit 2 State Parks and I still got in my Saturday morning run. As my son says, "This summer I want to spend A LOT of time outside. Outside, outside, outside." Done!

5. The honor of being the author of a successful book. I'll write more about this later in the week, but in these days of struggle for the book publishing world, I'm thankful for the readers who spread the word about We Are Girls Who Love to Run and encourage others to make it part of their treasured book collection. For an independent publishing company with a minuscule budget, Balanced Steps is really having a positive impact on young readers and their families!

Wishing you health, sunshine and happy running!

Lost in the Pages: Review of Do Princesses Wear Hiking Boots? by Carmela LaVigna Coyle

I picked up Do Princesses Wear Hiking Boots? by Carmela LaVigna Coyle at our local drug store on a whim one day. As an author, I'm a total sucker for books, especially picture books, and even more especially picture books for girls that somehow incorporate healthy living. Usually I think about them longer than 5 seconds before purchasing them, though. But this time the cover grabbed me, I totally forgot the purpose of my stop at the store, and off I went to the check-out to make it mine (under the guise that the book is for my daughter). Kudos to illustrators Mike & Carl Gordon for their whimsical artwork that truly stopped me in my tracks.

Things that make this book shine:

1. The author's daughter is credited for asking the question that created the book.

2. The book is a dialogue between a mother and daughter.

3. The girl's dog joins her on her questioning adventure ("Do princesses climb trees?" one page reads. The illustration shows the girl dangling from her knees on a branch. Her dog is doing the same with its back legs on the next branch over!).

4. The mother's answers to her daughter's questions are both playful and real.

5. This book celebrates the joy of life with healthy balance of adventure and responsibility (the girl has chores and goes to school - what more could a mom ask for?).

The only thing that I would change about the book is to make the main character a redhead. But only because my favorite little girl is a redhead (that would be my daughter), not for any REAL reason. But, since the mom is a redhead (like me), I really can't complain.

Without saying too much more (like giving away the surprise ending - which adds icing to the already wonderful cake of a book), I do have to add that I think this book has some great parallels with We Are Girls Who Love to Run and another book I reviewed just a little while ago, Sally Jean, the Bicycle Queen. All three books encourage girls to embrace the many facets of girlhood, let their inner selves shine, and to follow their hearts. Do Princesses Wear Hiking Boots? is truly a gift from the author and illustrators to the world of little girls. I look forward to sharing this book with my daughter as I help her recognize her inner strengths and explore the beauty of our day-to-day world.

How about you? Is there a book that really grabbed YOU recently? Do tell!

Checking the Numbers

I posted at the start of May that I would be tracking my mileage on the calendar. This is the first time I've really charted my distance since marathon training in 2003 (yikes, that was a long time ago!), so it was a true learning experience. I had to get back in the groove of remembering to transfer the happy little number from my Garmin to the calendar AND I had to get over the shock of how much lower my mileage was than I expected.

I was pleased to see that I really did get in 3-4 runs/week, which isn't bad when you consider we also got in a 4 day trip to CA to visit Yosemite and family and that I also did 18 miles on my bike (towing my daughter in the trailer, no less!) and we hiked countless miles. But 39.2 miles over the course of a month was lower than I thought it would be. If the Run Like Hell Half in Portland this October is going to be a successful reality, these feet have some more running to do!

How will I get my mileage up this month?

- My Saturday group runs really will turn into long runs now that more ladies are participating. At least two of the gals are also planning for the Half, so instead of 2-4 miles on Saturday, we'll be logging 5-6 to start and then increasing our mileage from there.

- My amazingly talented singer/songwriter friend, Loni Rose, is now joining me for a run on Wednesdays while our sons are in school (and maybe the boys can bike beside us when school is out!) and she likes to run a good distance. We celebrated National Running Day with a 5K run and were pleased to discover that our paces are similar and that we really had fun together (even though we were a bit slower than either of us would run with our husbands - less chatting with the guys, is my guess!). 2 loops around the lake is 5K, so next week we're adding a third loop.

- Now that my pace is a bit faster (when not talking too much!), I can get in more distance in a shorter time while pushing my daughter in the jogger. She's also happy to go now, especially if we can stop at a park mid-way or post-run. The park "carrot" also enables us to go for a bit longer.

- My son will be in a YMCA soccer/t-ball camp in the mornings the last week of June, allowing me to keep with our usual weekly routine for the month. July will be a different story, but I'm just taking things one month at a time.

How about YOU? What do you do to increase your mileage? Any challenges you have to work around?