St-run-ggling

The sun came out today for the first time in probably a week. For my own personal sanity I try not to count the sunless days, so I'm not sure exactly how long. Today also happens to be the day my daughter attends the oo-op preschool without me. This created the perfect equation:

Sunshine (and warmer temperatures, too!) + both children at school = TRAIL RUN!

With new shoes and a new long-sleeved running shirt on, I was ready to head out for my first trail run of the year promptly at 9:40AM. Apparently my mind, legs, lungs, and spirit all had a different start time in mind, because for the first 3.5 miles of my 4.4 mile run, they were all out of sync. Big time. And my self-pity whining kicked in, or "st-run-ggling" (a play on "struggling", ya know?) as I decided to call it.

"I haven't run the trail in a month. I'm slower than I run when I'm with the group on Saturday mornings. I had to stop and walk. My left hamstring is tight. I should have stayed home to fold the mountains of laundry waiting for me. If I can't run well today, what makes me think a half-marathon should be in my plan for the year?" . . . on and on the excuses and complaints went. And on and on my body and mind fought.

I nearly turned around at the 5K half-way mark, but my brain tricked my legs into staying the course.

At the 2 mile marker my brain was ready to give in, but my spirit took over and noticed that the sun was shining and I had the trail to myself. It would be a shame to give up and not make it the last stretch to the 2.2 mile turn around point (a major Roundabout that leads to "the city") when no rain was pelting my face and no children were whining.

At 2.2 miles I had no choice but to run another 2.2 miles back to my car, so after quick hamstring stretch and a deep breath, I got going again.

Somewhere between mile 3 and 3.5 I came to the realization that how I felt about this run was up to ME. So I began asking myself some important questions:

Why do I run? (It is time for myself, it makes me feel strong, I'm less stressed afterward, it is the only time that I feel beautiful while sweating)

Why did I choose the trail this morning? (The sun was shining, I wanted to test out my new shoes on the trail, my children were at school)

Why am I whining? (FOR NO GOOD REASON!!!)

And with that, everything fell into place. I found my stride, I lifted my chin, my steady breathing rhythm hit and off I went to finish the remaining 0.9 mile stretch.

When I reached the end of the trail and checked my watch, I realized the joke was on me. Despite the fact that I felt slower, stopped to watch some ducks duke it out in the river, took a stretch break and took several walk breaks . . . I still finished in under 40 minutes, which put me at under a 10:00 pace. Not bad considering all of the mental commotion.

So if someone asks me about my run today I can now say that it was a sunny, eye-opening run filled with self-reflection. Not my best run, but definitely not my worst. And now that I've faced my whining demons, I'm sure my next run WILL be a good one. It is all about perspective.

What do YOU do when your body-mind-spirit are out of whack on a run?

Breathing: The Most Important Tool in My Life Kit!

Every now and then life gets sticky, runs are more difficult, and the sun hides out behind the clouds for longer than I'd like. It is during these times in life (and sometimes they all happen at once, so it is a collective and singular time) that I find breathing to be my best tool.

One kid is galloping around the house like a Pony Express rider gone wild while the other is climbing chairs to get scissors and staplers out of the "grown-ups only" cupboard in the kitchen to "Project, Mama!". This is a recipe for disaster, especially if that first kid rides past the chair too quickly and knocks down the arts and crafts kid. Yelling seems easiest, but from experience I know that yelling just makes the horse go faster and more items fall out of the cupboard. What to do? BREATHE first, then assist the crafty gal in getting more age-appropriate items and suggest that the rider pull the horse to the nearest watering hole for a break. The BREATHE some more.

Now that my running workouts are back on track, I'm starting to increase my speed. Sometimes this is liberating and motivating, other times I think my body would rather go back to bed. When I realize negativity is getting hold of me with thoughts of cutting the run short or slowing down to make things easy, I get back to my BREATH and get in a steady rhythm, aligning my breaths with my stride. More often than not, once I get control of my BREATH I can finish out the scheduled run - and sometimes even knock out a little extra distance with a smile. I love how empowering those BREATHS can be!

While my rate of respiration never will be able to control Mother Nature and the amount of sunshine we get (or as of late, don't get), BREATHING does help me focus on what we DO have. Warmer temperatures enable us to take family walks, which make for happier kids, adults and dog. "Sun breaks", as they're called out here, are perfect opportunities for weeding a few square feet of garden while Mr. Music whacks trees with sticks and Little Sister slides, slides and slides some more on our little backyard structure. It may just be 10 minutes, but those 10 minutes are crucial to everyone's sanity and overall well-being.

And for this writer, BREATHING is the key for clearing the clutter from the mind. A calm BREATH makes everything more manageable. And taking the time to BREATHE makes me a happier, better person.

How about YOU? How does deliberate BREATHING support you in your times of stress - or times of delight?